So I just read this amazing book recently called Tuesday’s with Morrie. It’s one of those books that gives you a little more perspective on things we tend to forget about or ignore. It gives you the spark to question and find the answers as well.
I could probably point out a thousand different theories and ideas from the book that I loved…that I’d want to pass on to everyone else. But there’s one part in particular that really got to me and keeps me thinking bout it until now:
“I came to love the way Morrie lit up when I entered the room. He did this for many people, I know, but it was his special talent to make each visitor feel that the smile was unique.
‘Ahhh, it’s my buddy,’ he would say when he saw me, in that foggy, high-pitched voice. And it didn’t stop with the greeting. When Morrie was with you, he was really with you. He looked you straight in the eye, and he listened as if you were the only person in the world. How much better would people get along if their first encounter each day were like this–instead of a grumble from a waitress or a bus driver or a boss.”
‘I believe in being fully present,’ Morrie said. ‘That means you should be with the person you’re with. When I’m talking to you now, Mitch, I try to keep focused only on what is going on between us…
‘Part of the problem, Mitch is that everyone is in such a hurry,’ Morrie said. ‘People haven’t found meaning in their lives, so they’re running all the time looking for it. They think the next car, the next house, the next job. Then they find those things are empty, too, and they keep running…I would rather put my energies into people.’
He did this better than anyone I’d ever known. Those who sat with him saw his eyes go moist when they spoke about something horrible, or crinkle in delight when they told him a really bad joke. But really listening to someone–without trying to sell them something, pick them up, recruit them, or get some kind of status in return–how often do we get this anymore? I believe many visitors in the last few moths of Morrie’s life were drawn not because of the attention they wanted to pay him but because of the attention he paid to them….This little old man listened the way they always wanted someone to listen.” (p. 135-138)
Beautiful right? Everyone wants a little attention in their lives. I know I do. But at the same time, I want to be able to give as much care and attention as I can as well. Maybe that is what’s meant to make the biggest difference.
: : : I learned the hard way that they all say things you want to hear. And my heavy heart sinks deep down under you and your twisted words. Your help just hurts. You are not what I thought you were. Convinced me to please you; made me think that I need this too. I’m trying to let you hear me as I am : : :
— Love Song, Sara Bareilles —